Even in Online Dating, You Can Clean Up and Get a Second Chance!

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woman wearing white crew-neck t-shirt on bed holding silver MacBook A while back, I wrote a post about freshening up your profile with a disturbing picture of a buff guy sniffing his own armpit.  (Go on, go back and remember. It was a good post!) I decided to go with the cat in the bathtub this time.  Way cuter, no? Why should you freshen up your profile? Why bother changing it if it’s perfect? Why change it if you have a Geek’s Dream Girl profile already? The reason is SECOND CHANCES. Again, realize that I am speaking from my extensive experience on match.com.   This method does not apply to services like Chemistry or eHarmony, which close out matches permanently when someone says they’re not interested in you.   (sniffle  So sad, isn’t it?  Makes you want to switch to Loveawake.com!) After a while on match.com, you will realize that there are people in your area who are almost always _active on the site.  You see the same pictures cropping up again and again in your search results.   They were not so horrible that you blocked them, but were definitely not sparkly enough to catch your eye.   There they are, again, and again, and again. _Yawn. Girls see this too.  They may have you _on the “meh” list – you look okay, but definitely not shiny enough for a date.  But you ARE!  You ARE shiny enough!  What can you do to merit a second glance? Change your profile and your default picture once a month.  Maybe the change in the angle of your picture is more flattering to your features, maybe she just didn’t like your cowboy hat in the old picture. Maybe your headline about baseball turned her off (_and you don’t really like baseball THAT much anyway). Either way, you have a girl who is seeing your profile in a fresh light and is reconsidering you as a possible match. Have at least 3 good face shots that you can alternate as your default picture. Changing your profile text does not require a lot of time. Simply add in a line about what’s happening in your life right now:

  • I just saw the new Batman movie and it was amazing!
  • My favorite part of summer is sitting on my porch in the evening sipping sweet tea.
  • I can’t wait for the local film festival to start – are you going?

Nothing difficult, but a tiny change like that is what makes a girl know that you are serious about finding someone NOW.  The biggest turn-off for me is a guy whose stats say he is 30 and profile text says, “I just turned 27…“  That just screams, “I’m lazy, and I’ll be a lazy boyfriend too!” Invest a few moments each month to dust things off, wash a few windows, and move the furniture around a bit.  You’d be surprised how often this will bring in “new” matches! Happy dating, geek friends.

Dec. 16, 2020, midnight - Dec. 16, 2023, midnight
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Janet Yes